So many amazing people have spoken about the importance of great friendships. Jim Rohn once said, “You are the average of the 5 people you spend the most time with.” Robert Kiyosaki said, “Your network determines your net worth.” Oprah said “Surround yourself with only people who are going to lift you higher.” Yet so many of us are holding on to relationships that no longer serve us. Why is this?
Many believe that it is selfish to think that a relationship must serve us – I think that it’s foolish not to. If we do not have our best interests in mind, then who will?
Who are the 5 people that you spend the most time with? Are they a great reflection of who you are and/or where you want to be?
Goal chaser, who we spend time around matters - it shapes us. I like to have control over how I’m molded, and you should too. Here are 4 questions you must ask yourself today.
1. Am I The Smartest and Most Successful In The Room?
Success is relative to our individual definitions, however, if you’re the smartest and most successful of all your friends on every level, then there’s a problem.
You should aim to hang around those who stretch your mind, encourage intelligent conversation and challenge you. If you aren’t the smartest (or there’s possibility for debate) that’s great! Soak it up like a sponge.
Relationships teach us, even when we don't realize there is a lesson to be learnt. If the only lesson we are learning is how not to conduct ourselves, it’s time for a heart to heart with ourselves and to begin networking to find some new friends.
2. Do They Stifle My Vision?
Your goals should be encouraged by your circle of friends. They should be your accountability partners and biggest cheerleaders. When you have this kind of support, it’s difficult not to succeed. If they attempt stifle your dreams, this is a red flag. Exit, stage left.
Not everyone will understand you vision, and that’s fine - it is yours after all. If, however, your friends are telling you that your dreams are too big, there's a chance that theirs are simply too small, they’re jealous or simply worried that you’ll outgrow them. The friends you need shouldn’t be envious, they should be encouraging.
3. Do They Celebrate My Victories?
Successful individuals uplift other successful people and celebrate in their victories, confident that they too will soon have reason to celebrate. After all, when you hang around a positive and prosperous crowd, it’s only a matter of time before their drive for triumph rubs off on you – it’s contagious. Likewise, so is pessimism and scarcity.
If you get the cold shoulder or a lackluster “congrats” when sharing some great news, there’s a problem.
4. Do They Have A Bad Relationship With Money?
Of course, money (or the lack thereof) is not the sole definer of success. If, however, your circle of friends have a bad relationship with money (and by this I mean cannot keep it and/or think it’s somehow “bad” to have it) then you may need to reevaluate your company.
What we focus on grows. If a lot of time is spent complaining about finances or finding comfort in the thought that money itself is the problem, we will have less of it – and who wants that?
Money isn’t bad – some people and how they choose to use it are. It is time to get out of the lack mindset that money is no good for us. It is simply not the case.
Do you agree, disagree or have questions of your own you'd like to add? Let me know in the comments below!
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